


A Letter to You.

by marvuder



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Letters, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-14
Updated: 2020-10-14
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:40:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27009745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marvuder/pseuds/marvuder
Summary: Draco wrote Harry a letter before running away.Lots is left to imagination.
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter
Comments: 2
Kudos: 31





	A Letter to You.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! This is the first proper thing I've written and I would love some constructive criticism. The only way to get it was by posting this (which I'm really scared to do lol so be nice but honest pls). Don't expect this to be too great. It's also very short because I'm not too confident with my writing.

_Dear Harry,_   
_I’m writing this letter to really let out my feelings. It’s something my mother used to do. She obviously never told me this, I just found a few of them one time. Anyway, this letter will never reach you. It’s the only way I can express my feelings without going through utter humiliation._

_I hate the summer so much. It reminds me of you: of loving you. At first, it’s warm, happy, alive and comforting. Eventually, the heat consumes you and becomes too much. It doesn’t matter what clothes you put on or the amount of shade you hide in, the heat won’t go away. Lingering, suffocating and haunting. The days are longest in summer. You sit and wait for them to end and for the heat to go away. It doesn’t. The heat melts away your energy and you become tired. So unbelievably tired. I’m tired of loving you, Harry. After all, it’s not the love that kills you, it’s knowing it can’t and won’t be returned._

_Do you remember when we met? I do. We were so young and so naive. Always believed what people above us told us. We were in Madam Malkins. At the time, we had no idea how much pain and suffering we would put each other through. Or how much pain and suffering the people above us would put us through. Just a simple conversation, that’s all it was. That was all it took for you to decide you hate me and for me to decide you were boring and unworthy of my attention. Do you remember the second time we met? I do. I insulted Weasley - like the insufferable brat I was - and you decided that you hated me even more than you did the last time we met. I decided that you were unbearable and impossible to like. From that point on, we loathed each other. Do you remember the detention in the Forbidden Forest? I do. It was cold, dark and almost lonely. Lonely if not for you. I can’t say I enjoyed your presence at the time but it was better than being alone. You were brave and I was a coward. You have always been brave and I have always been a coward. You defied the Dark Lord and I followed him. You didn’t let fear control your actions and I used fear as an excuse for everything. I had a choice and you didn’t._

_Hate, quite similar to love. Similar in power. Both will consume you until it’s unbearable and you just want it to leave you alone. You just want it to let you live a life. Hate turned into curiosity. Curiosity turned into obsession. Obsession turned into love. You could say it’s a never ending cycle that all leads back to hate. I hate that I hate you. I hate that I love you. I hate that I'm curious about you. I hate that I'm obsessed with you. It feels like I’m drowning. I’ve reached the bottom of the ocean and there is no way out._

_I’m glad you will never see this. Not that your feeble mind could understand anyway._

_Love,_   
_Draco_

But Harry did find the letter. He found it in the worst way possible. He hadn’t seen Draco for a week. The only time that had ever happened was when it was the holidays at Hogwarts. So was Harry concerned? Yes, he was extremely concerned. He searched everywhere he knew that Draco liked to hide. The places that were his shade. His bedroom was still neat and tidy but things were missing. His little den in the furthest corner of the Malfoy Manor gardens was still standing. The little safe house he decorated for himself was empty. Draco simply didn’t want to be found. Harry found the letter hidden in a box stuffed under his bed. A classic hiding place, he wouldn’t have thought Draco could be so basic.

Harry was not feeble minded - not in this situation anyway. He knew exactly what Draco had meant and he decided to suffer in silence. If only he spoke out to Draco and told him how he was feeling. If only he even tried to make an effort, this would never have happened. Draco would still be at home and safe. He would still be smiling and laughing at Harry’s jokes, breaking his facade when no one is around. Harry’s heart is weak and his mind is a mess. He could’ve stopped this, he should’ve stopped this. If Draco was here, he would tell Harry to stop with his hero complex and get his head out of his arse. But Draco wasn’t here and there was nothing Harry could do. Draco didn’t want to be found and that had to be respected. No matter how distraught Harry was and no matter how much Harry loved Draco back, he still respected him. He respected his decision to leave and he respected his decision to not be found. The only thing Harry could think of doing was writing a letter back, so that’s what he did.

_Dear Draco,_   
_I saw your letter. Stupid and original hiding place. I guess you never expected anyone to look for it, so why would you hide it somewhere secretive? I have no idea how to say this to you, Draco, so i’m going to be blunt. I love you too. I have no beautiful metaphors and no fancy handwriting, but I love you too. I respect your choice to leave and I understand if you don’t want to come back. I just wanted you to know. I don’t even know if this letter will reach you but I want you to know I miss you. It’s only been 2 days and I don’t know what to do when you’re not here. Come home, Draco, I need you._

_Love,_   
_Harry x_

Harry apparated to Diagon Alley and purchased an owl to take the letter. He still hadn’t bought a new one since Hedwig had died, it would’ve felt like replacing her. He had no idea where Draco was. None at all. He just hoped the owl was clever enough to find him.


End file.
